i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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