When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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