Sry I called you an 8
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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