He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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