A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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