I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
