This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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