so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Randomize
