? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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