I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Bring me that man meat
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
