Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
