I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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