i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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