is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
