Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
