Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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