And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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