i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
