Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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