yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
There r osticjed everywhere
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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