The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
No I am not eating basil off your cock
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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