just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
