I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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