Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
