I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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