Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
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