we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
