Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize