I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize