I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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