At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
