I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
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