the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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