You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
