Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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