Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
