i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
