just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
this will be a night to untag.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize