if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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