ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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