Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Are we in a gay sports bar?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
