threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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