I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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