90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize