the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
