I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I have post one night stand depression
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