Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
