haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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