he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
