Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
