He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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