I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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